Just need a break, please

I need help please. I really could use some basic human decency, an act of kindness. Ive lived a really rough life and have had terrible things happen to me. Yet I kept going and somehow managed to raise 4 kids and put myself through college and I had a good run for ten years. Then my entire world collapsed about 3 yrs ago. Thrown into the fire by my own family I found myself homeless and with a drug addiction that stemmed from the need to be able to cope with the things happening around me. I was able to kinda make things work for me until a little over 6 months ago my best friend in the whole world was hit by a car and died. Since Jordan s death I have spiraled down. Its freezing outside and I stay in an unfinished tiny home I.E a shed without a roof. Im always so sick from not being able to afford what i need to be well and cope. I'm in such a desperate place right now. I know that if I could just get a little help I may be able to get the desire to do something different. I know that a car is a good start. But i eventually would like to open my own food truck. But I know realistically my head is so beyond messed up, I have bipolar, anxiety, ptsd, and Add. I am so on the brink of suicide because of my intense discourd of how ive seen people be treated and deserted and I cant make it stop. I really just need a break please, anyone.