Fresh Start
my name is Shamia and I am a 26 year old who needs a push in the right direction. I have had my ups and downs and have been through a lot in my lifetime.
I am not here with a sob story or traumatic event. I come completely transparent and as honest as I can be. I am currently living in a house with no power and on the verge of coming completely apart. I have been living in this house since December. And its just very depressing but motivating everyday to get up and keep pushing to make better days for myself.
I was working as a cab driver but unfortunately I got robbed after month of working there. I quit and now I just got hired as a seafood clerk at a local grocery store. I want better for myself and I am looking for every angle possible to get there.
I did attend college for a semester and I truly enjoyed it but due to my circumstances its hard for me to focus and do the best I can academically. I want to go to school and get my degree and finally give my family something to be proud of me for.
I realized a path to a better life starts internal. So I have been going to counseling for mental health help and I have been more self loving. My life has been based on trying to make others happiness even if it means sacrificing my own and I am completely fine with that. I am the most giving and loving humanitarian you will ever meet. I just get in my own way and mess things up but I always learn from my mistakes and try again.
I will never ever be a quitter. Right now I am looking for help to get my name back in order so when it is time for me to move and I have saved up enough money I can move worry free.
I have a BGE thats just under $4,100. I was evicted in October of 2014 and even after multiple request of having the power shut off it never got cut off and I was continuously billed.
I have been looking for places that are utilities included because of this reason. I will only be making $9.25 a hour and I will not be able to leave my situation anytime soon with that huge bill. Even if the bill is paid directly to the company I would be tremendously grateful, I dont have to have money directly sent to me. I really just want that bill paid to give me a fresh start.
A peace of mind calms the soul and thats all I really want. Having your own home provides that. After all my mistakes and irresponsibility I look back and I am ashamed of how many opportunities I blew because I was not grateful and didnt fully understand what I had. I was so immature.
Hopefully, I will be able to get the help that I need to help me move forward in my life so I will never reach rock bottom again. Its not about learning the lesson BUT about how many times you have to learn before you actually get it...and this time I do. I never want to live like this or experience this ever again.
Thank you for your time.
